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Unseen Commentary #1: Venice

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Commentary on Venice (1960) by Jan Morris

This is an extract from a travel-writing piece titled Venice by Jan Morris. Through this piece, Morris explores different social aspects of a Venetian society by focusing on the way children in Venice are taken care of by their parents, treated in school and how they engage in recreational activities. Her depiction of Venice causes readers to deem the city as an urban community in which almost everything is constricted, and thus, boring. In addition to giving readers a glimpse of Venice, this non-fiction prose also sheds light on Jan Morris as a person.

From the first paragraph, it is evident that Morris regards Venetian parents as too loving of their children – to the point where they radiate a “sickly intensity” (1). She described them as parents who “show signs of instant cardiac crisis if little Giorgio ventures within six feet of the water” (2-3). The hyperbole utilized here is so ridiculous that it hints at the gentle mocking tone of the author, which consequently adds humor into the prose. The use of “little Giorgio” (3) to stereotype Venetian children, and the exhaustive imagery of them equipped with “pocket handkerchiefs” (4), “lace-embroidered drawers” (5), “polished shoes” (20) and “impeccable hair” (20) also conveys how the author regards Venetian parents’ overprotectiveness of their children as absurd.

The writer also vividly portrays Venice as “not altogether an easy city for children to live in” (7) by pointing out its “distant parks” (9), “hot dry squares” (10) and “dripping alleyways” (11). Additionally, the mention of “blithe but pathetic…groups of urchins” (10) also indicates a type of social divide that exists within the Venetian society. With its urban landscape, it is not surprising that the Venetian state schools “generally occupy talk, dark, overheated buildings” (14-15), where mid-morning breaks are “celebrated indoors, with a biscuit or an orange at a blank brown desk” (16-17). The diction of “celebrated” not only maintains Morris’ subtle mockery, but also indicates her sarcastic tone towards the schooling condition in Venice. Furthermore, the alliteration in “blank brown desk” (17) underlines the dull nature of Venetian state schools, and this highlights the author’s view that Venice is not a great city for children.

In the third and last paragraph, Morris talks about how children in Venice “[takes] a breath of air” (19) when school is over. She contrasts how the children “stroll sedately along the quay” (21) against the “dancing lagoon” (21) beside them. The comparison gives readers the impression that even the lagoon is having more fun than the children. Moreover, the description of the fairground also tells readers how the children are “ardently delighted by every bump of the merry-go-round” (26-27). Both the personification of the lagoon and the imagery of the children in the fairground, communicate the writer’s point that there is barely anything exciting in Venice.

According to Morris, the way the Venetian society is structured leads to “Little Venetians often [seemingly] old beyond their years, and frighteningly well-informed” (29-30). The juxtaposition of “frighteningly well-informed” re-iterates that Venice is not a fitting city for children. Morris sustains this perspective until the end of the passage by presenting readers with an anecdote of how an eight-year-old Venetian ended up being the only one with Petrarch’s inscriptions on the walls of Doge’s Palace. The anecdote adds humor to the passage and successfully concludes the extract in a light-hearted manner.

With regards to Jan Morris herself, readers get the impression that she is observant; this is noticeable from her descriptions of the Venetian society. Readers are also inclined to think that she’s well-educated as she utilized phrases like “blithe but pathetic” and made a reference to the burning of Doge’s Palace in 1479. The way she uses a lot of adverbs throughout the passage, however, makes her sound judgmental. Nevertheless, despite the mention of her children in the Venetian state schools and her vast knowledge of the Venetian community, it feels like Morris is writing as an outsider of that community.

In conclusion, through Venice, Jan Morris offers her perspective on three aspects surrounding the lives of children in Venice: their parents, schools and city. The overall image readers gain of Venice is that it’s a tedious urban city where children generally don’t have much freedom due to the way their families treat them, and the limited variety of activities they can carry out inside as well as outside of school. She conveys her view by effectively using an eclectic range of literary devices such as alliteration, personification and imagery to successfully bring about an undermining tone of gentle mockery with occasional sarcasm throughout the passage.

MS. HELEN’S COMMENTS

Overall excellent, a few reminders include:

  • Use present tense when writing about literature.
  • Keep the register formal: no contractions of ‘I’.
  • Subject-verb agreement.
  • Use literary terms as much as possible (e.g: diction instead of word choice).
  • Topic sentence (what is the paragraph about?): first sentence of every body paragraph.
  • Thesis (what is the point you’re making through the essay?): last sentence of introduction and conclusion.

SCORE

  • A (Knowledge and understanding): 4/5
  • B (appreciation of writer’s choices): 4/5
  • C (organization and development): 4/5
  • D (language mechanics): 5/5
  • Total: 17/20

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